She Will Be Loved

Too Much Time
In these pants.
Woke up early for shower...

NotMe: Hi, Nick
Me: Oh, he looks normal today.

Kim: What's the worst thing someone could do during a date?
NotKim: She could whip off her pants... during dinner... and ask if you want something else to eat.

Nathan: I'm the gay teacher. I was gay with Cote.

Peanuts.

Bathroom stories, ahah.

I felt it would be rude to exclude your idea from the list :)